Broken Melody
by IAmPhoenix
Summary: The pain had reached a point of being unbearable and all I wanted to do was sleep. Forever. It felt as though a hole had been punched through the center of my chest and every time I took a breath, the hole stretched and the intake of air burned through to my core like a fire from the deepest recesses of Hell. Paul/OC
1. Intro

_**Missing You**_

_**Brandy, Tamia, Gladys Knight & Chaka Khan**_

_**(from the Set It Off soundtrack)**_

_Though I'm missing you._

_(Although I'm missing you.)_

_I'll find a way to get through._

_(I'll find a way to get through.)_

_Living without you._

_Cause you were my sister,_

_My strength and my pride._

_Only God may know why._

_Still I will get by._

_Who would've known,_

_That you'd have to go so suddenly, so fast?_

_How could it be that our sweet memories,_

_Would be all, all that we'd have left?_

_Now that you're gone, everyday I go on (I go on),_

_But life's just not the same._

_(Life's just not the same.)_

_I'm so empty inside, _

_And my tears I can't hide._

_But I'll try, I'll try to face the pain._

_Though I'm missing you..._

_**Intro: Missing You**_

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Six.

A river of tears flowed steadily down my face. I attempted to wipe them away as they ran their unwanted maze down my cheeks, but the harder I wiped, the harder they fell.

_"Crying doesn't mean you're weak. It just means you've been strong for too long."_

I could still hear her voice so clearly, although it had been nearly three years since she'd spoken a word to me. If I didn't know any better I would've turned around, expecting her to be standing there. Looking at me with those beautiful hazel-green eyes, smiling that crooked smile that always seemed to make the sun shine just a little bit brighter. Sadly I knew better. She wouldn't there now or any other time. She was gone and never coming back. But that didn't stop me from wanting her to be real again. Even if only for a moment.

I stared down at the six light blue stepping stones to happiness in the palm of my hand. One always took me to a happy place. A place where it didn't hurt as much. Where I didn't feel as empty. Two kept the ache away for days. Two filled the lonely black hole in my heart. Two made life bearable for a short while. And six...six would keep the pain away forever. They had to. The pain had reached a point of being unbearable and all I wanted to do was sleep. Forever. It felt as though a hole had been punched through the center of my chest and every time I took a breath, the hole stretched and the intake of air burned through to my core like a fire from the deepest recesses of Hell. I just wanted it to stop. I just didn't want to hurt anymore. I didn't want to feel so broken. Yes, six should fix everything. After all, six had always been my lucky number. And hers. It was one of the many things we had in common. We were both born on the sixth day of the sixth month, six years apart. Her at 6:06am, me at 6:06pm, both weighing six pounds, six ounces. Six had brought us together once and surely it had the power to do it again.

I sank to the floor, the edge of the bathtub pressing into my back, just beneath my shoulders. The cold tiled floor pressed against the back of my thighs, the pills clutched tightly in my left hand. Our song played softly in the background. I mindlessly mumbled the words, not really needing to hear the song to get them in the right order. I had memorized them many years ago.

"Count on me through thick and thin. A friendship that will never end. When you are weak, I will be strong. Helping you to carry on. Call on me. I will be there. Don't be afraid. Please believe me when I say...count on...you can count on me." I choked back a sob. "You said I could count on you. You lied!"

My gaze fell to the right, a half empty bottle of Patron tequila stared back at me beckoning me to consume the liquid comfort within. It had been hers. I'd found it beneath her covers when I'd slept in her bed a few nights before she'd chosen to take her life. I didn't want anyone else to find it. I didn't want them to know her secret. Most importantly I didn't want them to send her away again. When she came home the next day, I told her I had it and she told me to hold on to it. She promised that she'd come for me and the bottle. She never came back for it and she never came back for me. Maybe I should have told someone. Maybe things would be different if I had. Maybe they could've saved her. Maybe they wouldn't have found her two days later. Dead.

I placed the pills on my left thigh in a small pile and picked up the bottle. Taking a deep breath, I pulled out the stopper and placed it on the floor. Picking up one of the pills from the pile I placed it on my tongue then washed it down with a sip of tequila. I fought the urge to gag and cough as the liquid burned a fiery path down my throat and into my chest cavity. Before I lost my nerve and my lunch, I popped two more pills into my mouth and washed them down with more of the acrid liquid. I placed the bottle to my lips again and allowed the liquid to flow freely into my open mouth. It burned. It hurt. It was painful in a way that was so different from my usual empty ache. I liked it. After finishing nearly a quarter of the liquor I placed the bottle back on the floor and swallowed another pill, this time dry. Two more and I'd be free. My eyes closed as I hummed along with our song, it had started over for the fourth time since I'd locked myself into the bathroom. I grabbed the bottle from the floor and took another sip. The burn was becoming familiar to me now. My body welcomed it.

My mind wandered back to a time when we were together when we were happy. It was the Fourth of July, the year before she died. We were taking turns pushing each other on the old wooden swing hanging from the huge oak tree in our backyard. The air smelled of barbeque and fireworks. Fireflies fluttered near by, running from the grubby little hands of the children chasing them.

"Push me higher, Babycakes!" She laughed, calling me by the nickname that had been given to me by our father. Her long black hair flowed behind her like a silk sheet blowing in the wind. I pushed her as hard as my scrawny twelve year old arms would allow me to.

Then I heard the screaming. My mother's voice. She sounded as though she was yelling my name through ten closed doors. I wanted to answer her but I couldn't. My mouth formulated the words but no sound came out. She continued to yell, begging me to answer her, and then it came. The sound of wood splintering. After that, everything blurred together in one slow motion ball of colorless shapes.

"We've got a sixteen year old female, approximately one hundred twenty pounds, five feet two inches tall. Looks like an attempted suicide. Mother found an opened bottle of one milligram Xanax tablets and a nearly empty bottle of tequila next to her body on the bathroom floor. It's unknown how many pills she ingested. She's still breathing and semi-conscious. Responds to light but unable to speak and doesn't respond to pain. In route to Forks General. ETA five minutes. Please advise."

I failed. A tear slid from the corner of my eye as I watched the shadowy figure of what I assumed to be a paramedic fumbling with something mounted over my head. My mother sat to my left, softly rubbing my hand and mumbling to herself about how she should've kept a closer eye on me. No amount of eyes bearing down on me would've changed the way I felt. No amount of supervision could've saved me from myself. I was beyond help.

"Just hold on sweetie. We're almost there." My mother leaned in close to me, her voice just below a whisper. "You ungrateful little brat how could you do this to George and I? What will the neighbors think when they find out I gave birth to two psychos? I don't know why you're so hell bent on destroying what's left of our reputation. First the cutting and now this. You better hope you die because I'm going to kill you if word of your little stunt gets around town."

I wanted to scream at her to get away, to leave me alone, to stop pretending that we were some happy little family. George was the reason Harmony was gone, the reason I didn't want to be here anymore and she did nothing to stop him. If their reputation had gone to shit it was all their fault.

The ambulance came to a jarring stop and a few seconds later, the back doors were ripped open. I could make out the silhouettes of a man and a woman, but nothing beyond that. It was like I was staring at the world through frosted glass. I could see everything, yet nothing. I could feel my body floating from the back of the ambulance before rolling across the ground and into a brightly lit room. The room smelled of bleach, sickness and death. I gagged. I willed my eyes to shut, to block out the blinding light, but they didn't comply. Voices were shouting for people to clear out of the way as we made a sharp turn around a corner. My head lulled to the side and that's when I saw him. At least I think it was a him. A tall broad figure stood to the left of me, a warmth like I'd never felt in my life radiating from him, pouring directly into me. I felt safe. He was there to make it better, to take me away and I was ready to go. I tried to reach for him but my arms wouldn't move. And as quickly as he'd come, my angel was gone. Without me.

**A/N: Two years ago my big sister committed suicide and when she did, a part of me died with her. She was like a second mother to me, so sweet and nurturing. I still struggle with the constant feelings of anger, sadness and not truly understanding why as she didn't leave a letter. She was always my biggest fan and my biggest supporter when it came to anything I wanted to do especially writing. She always insisted that I "show the world what I'm made of". I started not to post this story because I felt that it was too personal, or that people wouldn't understand or that it was too sad, but then I heard her voice in my head, yelling at me in a way that only she could, telling me that I need to do this so I can heal. So this story is for her as much as it is for me. I love and miss you sissy-face. I hope I'm making you proud.**


	2. One: She Will Be Loved

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews, kind words, favorites and follows. I truly appreciate it. **

_**She Will Be Loved**_

_**Maroon 5**_

_I don't mind spending every day  
Out on your corner in the pouring rain  
Look for the girl with the broken smile  
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile  
And she will be loved  
And she will be loved_

Tap on my window, knock on my door  
I want to make you feel beautiful  
I know I tend to get so insecure  
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies  
It's compromise that moves us along, yeah  
My heart is full and my door's always open  
You come anytime you want, yeah.

I don't mind spending every day  
Out on your corner in the pouring rain  
Look for the girl with the broken smile  
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile  
And she will be loved  
And she will be loved  
And she will be loved  
And she will be loved

_**One: She Will Be Loved**_

****Paul****

My heart broke into a million pieces as I stared into her lifeless blue-gray eyes. She looked so fragile, so broken, so afraid. If it wasn't for the fact that I could hear her heart beating from across the room, I would've thought she was dead. It was a faint beat, weakening with every shallow breath she took, but she was still alive. That's all that I could ask for. I couldn't explain why I felt so drawn to her or why I felt that I needed to protect her. I just did. My mouth opened and closed repeatedly as I struggled to figure out what the hell was going on.

"Paul!" A familiar voice called, snapping me from my trance. I looked down and saw Sue standing next to me with her hands on her hips and a concerned look on her face. I could tell by the way she called my name that she'd been trying to get my attention for a while. She was the reason why I was at the hospital after all.

Her car had stalled on her while she was driving to work this morning and Jake was still working on it so I had been left with the task of picking her up from work since Seth was still in school and Leah had patrol. I didn't mind though. Sue had been like a mom to me since my dad and I moved back to La Push after my mom left us. I spent a lot of time at the Clearwater's house when I was younger and my dad had to work overtime or was just too fucking drunk to be a parent. There were times when I used to wish that Sue and Harry really were my parents then Leah would open her big ass mouth, say something that made me want to punch her head off her shoulders and I'd quickly let that thought go. Our relationship had improved a little since we'd gotten older, even with all her bitterness towards Sam and men in general, but I still wouldn't want to be related to her. Poor Seth had definitely got the short end of the stick when the man upstairs handed out siblings.

"Huh..." I mumbled. My gaze was still focused in the direction the stretcher had gone. I couldn't see her anymore but in a way, I could still feel her.

"Are you ok?" She placed a gentle hand on my arm. "You're burning up!" She quickly pulled her hand back and shook it as if I'd really burned her.

I looked down at her with my famous "no shit Sherlock" look. "That's nothing new, Sue."

"No Paul, you're hot even for _you_. Come with me." She motioned with her head for me to follow her through the same door my mystery girl had gone through. I smirked. I'd follow Sue to the moon if it got me closer to her.

As Sue led me to an empty exam room, I saw the woman that had come in with the broken girl. She didn't look concerned at all as she casually checked her make up in her small hand mirror. When she noticed me staring at her, she blushed, sat up straighter and tugged at the hem of her V-neck sweater attempting to emphasize her saggy boobs. I shook my head in disgust and followed Sue into the exam room.

"Sit down and open your mouth." She placed a protective plastic sleeve on the oral thermometer and held it out towards me.

"Sue, what's with the girl in the room across the hall?" I mumbled as I struggled to keep the thermometer under my tongue.

"The nurse?" she asked, reaching her hand out to hold the thermometer in place.

I waited until it beeped and she removed it before I answered her question. "No, the girl on the stretcher."

"I'm not sure Paul and I couldn't tell you if I wanted to." Sue answered honestly. She frowned as she looked down at my temperature. "Why? Do you know her?"

"No but..." I paused for a moment, unsure of how to explain what I was feeling. If anybody would understand, it would be Sue. Not only was she a member of the tribal council, but she'd also been married to a shifter and both of her kids were shifters. "It's like I want to go over there and wrap her in my arms. Protect her from whatever the fu...err...he...whatever put her here."

"Paul did you...?" Sue's eyes widened and a smile spread across her face. She was such a sucker for love.

"No, I don't think I did. I mean I don't know. I feel different but it's nothing like what I've seen in Sam and Jared's thoughts. The ground didn't move, I don't feel like I can fly or any of that other shi-stuff."

"Give me a few minutes. And your temperature is one hundred and thirty-two degrees. You're going to see Dr. Cullen as soon as we get back to the reservation."

I started to argue with her but decided against it. Better to be safe than sorry. A few months ago Brady and Collin had picked up a virus, a new strain of Spanish influenza or some shit. It took them weeks to get over it and Brady had nearly died in the process. Our enhanced healing and immune system barely did a damn thing to combat the virus and unfortunately for us, going to a normal hospital wasn't an option. One look at our abnormal blood cells and the whole rez would be quarantined or turned into a circus sideshow. Luckily we had Carlisle to treat what Old Quil's concoctions couldn't cure. Carlisle even treated some of the people on the rez that didn't have insurance to go to Forks General and the ones that the rez doctors couldn't help. Being a rich bloodsucker gave him access to medicines and equipment that our doctors just couldn't afford in their small three room clinic. Things between our families and his were still strained, but we had each others backs when it came down to it. And on the plus side, Emily had learned a few new recipes from Esme and Edward so we weren't stuck eating muffins all the damn time anymore.

A few minutes later, Sue came back into the room. "Her name is Melody Toussaint, she's sixteen. Her older sister, Harmony, committed suicide three years ago. I remember her from when I worked in the psych ward. She was constantly in and out of this place for one reason or another. Very sweet girl, but so troubled." Her gaze shifted towards the floor.

"What's wrong, Sue?"

"Paul, Melody attempted suicide. She's been here twice before, but has never been formally committed. She's a cutter and..." Her voice trailed off. I could see tears forming in the corner of her eyes.

I jumped up from the bed and grabbed Sue by the arm, I didn't mean to, it just happened. As soon as I realized what I was doing I let her go. "Shit! I'm sorry. Sue, I'm sorry." _Fuck, Leah and Seth are going to kill me if she has a mark on her._

"It's ok Paul." She said, patting my arm. "I'm not hurt." She rolled up her sleeve to emphasize her point. Her arm was a little red in the spot I'd grabbed her but it wouldn't leave a bruise or anything. I breathed a sigh of relief. She was always more patient with me about my temper than anybody else. She even got me into meditating and doing yoga. That shit really didn't do anything but make me sleepy, but I'd never tell her that.

"What's wrong with Melody?" Her name rolled off my tongue like I'd been saying it all my life.

Sue let out a heavy sigh. "Paul, she slipped into a coma and they don't know if she's going to recover."

My heart dropped. "Can I see her?"

Sue shook her head and eyed me cautiously. "Paul, I think it would be best if you didn't." She was patient but she still didn't trust me to control my temper in certain situations.

"Sue, you know I can't stay away from her. Maybe I can help her get better. You know, like Sam did for Emily." After Sam had accidentally phased too close to Emily and damn near ripped her head off, he spent countless hours by her bedside when he wasn't on patrol. Sue and Old Quil said that it was during those times that she made the most progress. Emily's body used the imprint as a source of medicine, healing her wounds much quicker than any concoction Old Quil gave her. It also helped that she had about three pints of donated blood from Sam. Your imprint is your perfect match in every way, including blood type.

"I know and I wouldn't dare try to keep you away from her." She shook her head and a small smile appeared on her face. "Give me two or three days and I'll try to get as much information on her as I can. And that will give me time to see what her family's visiting pattern is. The last thing we want to have to explain is who you are and why you're in her room. In the mean time I'll keep you updated as much as possible. She won't be on my floor but I have a friend that works in the PICU that I might be able to get some information from. She was in the psych ward with me and she knows how attached I was to Melody's sister when she was here."

"Two or three days?" I groaned. I knew I couldn't stay away that long. It was taking every ounce of strength in my body not to go across the hall right now. "And what the hell is the PICU?"

Sue sighed. " PICU is the pediatric intensive care unit. Since she's under eighteen and in a coma that's where they're going to transfer her. And two or three days is the best I can do for now, Paul. If her condition changes before then I'll let you know."

"Fine. Two or three days. Exactly." I conceded, looking up at the clock. "You've got until Thursday at seven twenty-four p.m. Not a minute longer. At seven twenty-five I'm charging through the front door in full wolf form and sniffing her out."

Sue swatted me with a box of gloves. "Sadly I know you'd do something like that."

I laughed. "Let's just hope it doesn't come to that."

After Sue and I left the hospital, she made me drive straight to Old Quil's house to wait on Dr. Cullen. This was one of the few places he was allowed on the rez. When we got there, my temperature had returned to normal. Old Quil said that it was probably so high due to my imprinting on Melody and we'd still need to monitor it for a few days. I smiled at the thought of my body already helping Melody's body repair itself. She would have a fighting chance as long as I was around.

"Why don't I feel any different?" I asked Old Quil. "I mean I see the way imprinting was for Sam and Jared and for me it's not the same."

"Your imprintee was not herself at the time. The drugs she had taken captured her soul and pushed her spirit into a dark realm. Her spirit is wounded therefore you will not fully feel the imprint until her spirit heals."

I swallowed hard and stared down at my hands. "How long will that take?"

"I cannot be for sure." Old Quil sat down in his rocking chair and stared out of the window, just as he always did when he was done talking. That's it? That's fucking it? This old guy really knows how to work my nerves. I started to say something, but instead I just stormed out of the house. I could feel my anger rising and my body trembling. I phased as soon as my feet hit the dirt and ran off into the woods. Quil probably would've been _a little_ pissed had I ripped his grandfather's head off.

Waiting those three days for Sue to give me the okay to visit Melody was pure torture. I ran extra patrols, helped Jake at his garage and even helped Billy and Charlie work on what they described as "the best damn fishing boat ever". I was pretty sure that boat would sink as soon as it hit the water, but working on it kept me busy. Nothing seemed to calm my nerves completely, not even cliff diving. Finally Thursday came and I got the text message that I felt like I had been waiting on forever.

I tried to control my breathing as I approached the reception desk. Sue told me that I shouldn't have any problem getting into Melody's room as long as I knew her first and last name, date of birth and the current code word for her room. And thanks to her, I had all that information. After some crazy homeless woman tried snatching a five year old cancer patient last year, the hospital had implemented code words for every minor patient's room. The word changed daily and every kid had a different word.

"Excuse me." I called out to the receptionist. She had her back turned to me, digging around in the file cabinet for something.

She turned around and dropped the files she was holding in her hands. Her thin face blushed bright red, or rather orange due to her spray on tan, as she bent down to pick up the files. Her head banged into the armrest of the chair. Normally I would've been flattered by a chick getting all flustered around me but the fact that she was keeping me from Melody was irritating.

"C-can I help you?" The girl finally managed to ask, twirling a piece of her stringy red hair around her finger.

"I'm here to see Melody Toussaint."

She typed the name into the computer. Her eyebrows knitted together. "I need her date of birth and the minor protection password to allow you access to her room.

"June 6, 1991 and the password is jellybean." I responded. I'd memorized the information as soon as Sue had texted it to me.

She scribbled some information on the visitor's pass. "Take the elevator to the sixth floor. When you exit, turn right, walk to the end of the hall then make a left."

"Thanks." I took the pass from her and looked down at it. Room 646 and at the bottom of the paper was the receptionist's name and phone number with a smiley face. I shook my head and tore that portion of the pass off then tossed it into a nearby garbage can. Women.

I smiled as I walked into Melody's room. There were two vases of sunflowers lined up on the window sill. I don't know why I decided on that flower, but I just felt like she was a sunflower kind of girl. On the table next to her bed was a huge vase of white and pink flowers, lilies I think, that Kim, Claire, Emily and Leah had sent. I placed another vase of sunflowers on the windowsill then tied the get well balloons to the handle on the closet door.

I took a seat in the chair next to her bed. The closer I moved to her bed, the stronger her heartbeat got. I smirked. I was definitely the drug she needed. With me by her side, she actually had a chance of making it through this bullshit. I just sat there for a moment staring at her. Her dark blondish brown hair was in a mess of tangled curls all over her head and in desperate need of a comb, dark circles had formed underneath her eyes and her skin was pale, almost vampire pale. But she was still so breathtakingly beautiful. I leaned forward and traced the pink scars on her left wrist and forearm. Some were thin while others were thick. There were a few that looked fresh, maybe a few days old while others looked like they'd been there for years. Her right arm was bandaged from wrist to elbow. I felt a tight squeeze on my heart as I surveyed the damage she'd done to herself. My beautiful broken Melody. It didn't matter if it took me a lifetime, I'd make her whole again.

I felt like an idiot just sitting there, staring at her and rubbing her arm, but I didn't really know what to say. And although I knew she couldn't respond I still felt like I had to say something. So I just said the first thing that popped into my head.

"Hey. My name is Paul Lahote and I'm gonna love you like you've never been loved before."


	3. Two: Angel

_**Angel**_

_**Sarah McLachlan**_

_Spend all your time waiting  
for that second chance  
for a break that would make it okay  
there's always some reason  
to feel not good enough  
and it's hard at the end of the day  
I need some distraction  
oh beautiful release  
memories seep from my veins  
let me be empty  
and weightless and maybe  
I'll find some peace tonight_

In the arms of the angel,  
fly away from here  
from this dark cold hotel room  
and the endlessness that you fear  
You are pulled from the wreckage  
of your silent reverie  
You're in the arms of the angel  
may you find some comfort her.

So tired of the straight line  
and everywhere you turn  
there's vultures and thieves at your back  
and the storm keeps on twisting  
you keep on building the lies  
that you make up for all that you lack  
it don't make no difference  
escaping one last time  
it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh  
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of the angel  
fly away from here  
from this dark cold hotel room  
and the endlessness that you fear  
you are pulled from the wreckage  
of your silent reverie  
you're in the arms of the angel  
may you find some comfort here  
you're in the arms of the angel  
may you find some comfort here

****Melody****

I felt him as soon as he entered the room. An indescribable warmth filled me, taking away the numbing chill of the hospital room. Even with the tubes in my nose I could smell him. He smelled like the forest, fresh and clean with a hint of lemon and something else I couldn't quite put my finger on. My angel was back to get me. I tried to open my eyes to look at him, but nothing happened. I tried to lift my hand to reach out for him, but it wouldn't move. Was I dead? Is this what the afterlife felt like? A complete loss of all body movement.

I heard the chair next to my bed scrape across the floor as he pulled it closer. He sat there for a while, stroking my hand, rubbing my scars, not saying anything. I wanted to yell for him to stop, but in a way, his touch soothed me. With him there, nothing hurt anymore.

"Hey. My name is Paul Lahote and I'm gonna love you like you've never been loved before." He said, lightly tracing his fingers over the bandages on my right arm.

His words sounded so sincere and I wanted to believe them, but my heart wouldn't let me. Everyone that had ever loved me was gone. And if by some miracle, he found me suitable to love, he'd just leave. Just like my father. Just like Harmony.

"That was probably the dumbest thing I've ever said. Hell, I don't even know if you can hear me, but I'd feel like a complete asshole if I just sat here and didn't say anything." He exhaled loudly. His breath was warm and smelled sweet like honey and blueberries with a touch of mint. "I was in the ER when they brought you in. I had my aunt, she's a nurse here, keep and eye on you for he past few days and she told me this morning that I could come see you. I hope you don't mind me being here. I know this is some real stalker shit." He chuckled then cleared his throat. "But I have to be here. I feel like, no, I know that I need to protect you and make sure that you get better so we can get you out of here. I don't like seeing you hooked up to all these machines and shit."

His fingers continued to trace over my scars. I felt so exposed, so vulnerable. Nobody had ever touched my scars, except for Harmony when she would occasionally help me bandage them. I wasn't ashamed of them, in a probably sick and twisted way, I was proud of them. To me, they represented every battle I'd ever fought and won in the past five years. They were my battle wounds. Each scar represented my survival of an event that was meant to destroy me. Each scar told a story. Each scar held a memory. From the death of my father, to the death of my sister, to the times when I couldn't cry so I cut just to feel something. They were personal, they were significant, they were mine and I didn't like him touching them.

I had started cutting when I was eleven. It was about seven months after my daddy died from colon cancer. I had reached the point where I couldn't cry anymore, and all I wanted was for the pain to go away. At the time, I was contemplating slitting my wrist and leaving this cold, cruel world behind, but I couldn't imagine leaving Harmony. So instead of taking my life, I cut myself. A three inch gash along the side of my left wrist. I needed to feel, I needed to hurt and cry but I needed to stay alive for Harmony. She was taking daddy's death even harder than I was and I knew that if for no one else, I had to be strong for her.

Harmony was even more of a daddy's girl than I was and I think it was one of the reasons that mother hated her the most. She shared his love of sports, cars and even fishing. They spent countless hours in the garage working on daddy's 1965 Chevy Impala, watching basketball, baseball and football. And at least one weekend a month they went on a father daughter fishing trip. I didn't mind the extra attention Harmony got, not even the weekend trips. I was grateful that daddy wouldn't try to talk me into doing all those 'icky boy things'. She got to do all the boring stuff with daddy while I got to have tea parties, play dress up and act out scenes from my favorite Disney movies with him. There was nothing that daddy wouldn't do to keep his girls happy. Even if it meant wearing makeup and a feather boa.

Mother on the other hand acted as if our mere existence irritated her soul. She never did any of the things that a mother should do with their daughters. Everything we learned about being women we learned from daddy or his sister, our aunt Vivian. Mother was never there for school events, not even when Harmony, as a freshman in high school, won the lead in the school musical over four seniors. Not when at the ages of nine and twelve, we played second and third chair violin with the Seattle Symphony. She was never there for a bake sale, a dance or music recital, a scraped knee or a broken heart. The only time she showed any interest in us is when it benefited her. When she wanted to get into the Seattle Women's Association she dressed us up and paraded us around at their mother/daughter luncheon like prized ponies. When she wanted something from her parents, she dressed us up and hauled us off to Michigan because she was never welcome in their home without us. All our lives we were nothing more than pawns in her twisted game of life.

The first time I cut myself was the day after mother announced that she was marrying George, daddy's supposed best friend. The same best friend that sat at his bedside day after day watching him wither into nothingness, making promises to keep us girls in line and to make sure that if mom did remarry, she'd marry a man that was worthy not only of her, but of us girls. I had never really cared to much for "Uncle" George and neither did Harmony. Something about him was extremely creepy and made me keep my distance. Even his daughters, Autumn and Abigail, didn't seem to like him that much. They never had the same bond with him that Harmony and I shared with daddy, or even anything close for that matter. They barely spent one weekend a month with him.

We were having dinner when mother suddenly announced that George would be moving in soon and that they had plans to get married that following spring. My heart sank to the pit of my stomach. The man that made my skin crawl would now be a permanent fixture in my life. This was the first night that Harmony ran away from home. I begged her to let me go with her but she refused. Sometimes she'd stay gone just for the night and other times she stay away for weeks. Every time she left, I cut. Mother never even batted an eyelash at her absence. We had never mattered to her before, but now that George was in her life, the tiny bit of concern that she did show was swept away when George placed that ring on her finger. Just as mother had promised, George moved in and she married him the next year. Harmony was never the same.

"Hey Paul." A soft voice spoke, bringing me out of my thoughts. I suddenly felt a twinge of jealousy in my heart. Who was this woman and why was she talking to my angel?

"What's up, Emily?" He replied.

I heard a pair of high heels clicking across the floor as the woman approached the bed. She smelled like apples and cinnamon.

"So this is her, huh?" A soft hand caressed the side of my face. "She's beautiful, Paul."

Who the hell is Emily and why is she touching me?

"Yeah, she really is." I could hear the pride in Paul's voice.

"Paul, are you sure you want to do this?" Emily asked. "I mean she might not even wake up and if she does, she may never live a normal life. And we don't even know if you actually..."

He let out a loud sigh then grabbed my hand. "I've gotta do this Em. I can't leave her here all alone. Sue said none of her family has been to visit her since the first day. She needs me. I'm all she's got now."

He was wrong in a way. I might not have had anybody left in this world, but I didn't need anybody but either. The only two people I ever needed were my daddy and Harmony, but with both of them gone, my need for people had severely diminished.

"But..." Emily barely got the word out before Paul cut her off again.

"No buts. Her heartbeat has already gotten stronger since I've been here. You didn't see the way she stared at me when they wheeled her in here the other day. It was like she wanted to reach for me but she couldn't find the strength. She needs me and I need her. I'm not leaving her."

I hated how they were talking about me like I wasn't even in the room. My mother and George did this all the time. Nobody ever asked my opinion about what I wanted or how I felt. It made me feel so small and insignificant.

"Melody, this is, I guess you can say my sister-in-law, Emily." Paul said suddenly as if he had heard my thoughts. "Emily this is Melody. I'm not sure she can hear you but, shit, say something I guess."

I heard a loud smack then Paul laughed.

"Watch your freaking mouth Paul." Emily chided. "It's nice to meet you Melody. I can't wait until you wake up and we can officially meet."

"Got room for one more in here?" A deeper voice asked. I heard his sneakers squeaking across the floor.

His smell was similar to Paul's, only more woodsy, and he radiated the same warmth. It wasn't as intense as Paul's but the heat was unmistakable. Maybe I really was dead and they were all angels here to hold council over what would happen with my tragic soul.

"Well damn, is the whole pack here?" Paul mumbled. I could sense that he was a bit irritated. "Melody this is my kinda little brother, Seth. Seth this is Melody."

"Nope, just me and Em." the boy replied. He didn't even bother to acknowledge me like Emily had. "She brought me up here to visit a friend that got hit by a car. Mom told us you were up here so we snuck up. Just had to see the girl you won't shut up about or stop thinking about. Maybe now we'll stop getting a play by play of her looking all dead and stuff."

There was another loud smack and sickening crunch followed by a small yelp. I swear I even heard somebody growling.

"Dude, I think you broke my jaw." Seth mumbled.

"Paul!" Emily yelled. "You really need to learn to control your temper. What good are you to her if you everything constantly pisses you off? How do you expect to help her through what she's going through? Come on Seth, let's go see if we can find Dr. Cullen and have him reset your jaw before it heals wrong."

"Fuck." Paul grunted, flopping back down in the chair next to me. His head rested against my arm. He was trembling and his breathing was labored. His forehead was so hot that it felt like flames were licking at my skin. If I didn't know any better I would've thought that he was on fire. I tried to comfort him, but I couldn't. Not having control over my body was beginning to piss me off. With every ounce of energy I could muster, I attempted to yelled his name. All that came out was a small whimper.

"Melody? You ok?" He asked like I could really reply.

I could feel a tear rolling down my face, his finger immediately wiped it away.

"Don't cry." He leaned over and whispered in my ear. His lips touched my forehead and suddenly everything felt right in the world. "It's going to be ok. I promise." I wanted to believe him, but my heart was so shielded that I couldn't.

Paul sat there for the next few hours, telling me about life on the reservation. He talked about his brothers and their wives and girlfriends. He was convinced that they would love me and I'd fit right in with the rest of the girls. I can't see how that would be possible unless they were all broken and suicidal. He told me about the lush forest, the calming sea and the weekly bonfires. I don't know why, but I couldn't wait to see it. I even wanted to try cliff diving and camping under the stars. I wasn't the outdoorsy type because I hated anything with more legs than me. Hell, I didn't even like dogs or cats or gerbils or hamsters or cute little cotton tailed bunny rabbits. Anything that didn't walk on two legs made my skin crawl. But for some reason La Push, Washington sounded just like the place I needed to be. It sounded just like the type of serenity I needed in my life. It sounded like home. The more Paul talked about La Push, the more I wanted to get out of this bed. Out of nowhere I felt this wave of anger wash over me. Had I not tried to kill myself I wouldn't be in this position. I'd be able to get out of this damn bed and walk off with Paul right now. I was mentally scolding myself when it hit me. Had I not tried to kill myself, I wouldn't have ended up in this hospital and I would've never met Paul. I guess in a way, my almost death was a blessing in disguise. Now I just had to find a way to get out of here.

Paul continued to talk about his life and I realized just how much we had in common. His mother seemed to be a bitch like mine, maybe even more. The only parent he'd really had to count on his whole life was his father, just like me. I wanted to hug him, wrap him in my arms and tell him things would be okay. Somewhere during one of his stories, I drifted off into a deep slumber with dreams filled of a place I'd never seen. La Push.


	4. Three: If I Ain't Got You

_**If I Ain't Got You**__  
__**Alicia Keys**_

_Some people live for the fortune  
Some people live just for the fame  
Some people live for the power, yeah  
Some people live just to play the game  
Some people think that the physical things  
Define what's within  
And I've been there before  
But that life's a bore  
So full of the superficial_

Some people want it all  
But I don't want nothing at all  
If it ain't you baby  
If I ain't got you baby  
Some people want diamond rings  
Some just want everything  
But everything means nothing  
If I ain't got you, Yeah

Some people search for a fountain  
That promises forever young  
Some people need three dozen roses  
And that's the only way to prove you love them  
Hand me the world on a silver platter  
And what good would it be  
With no one to share_  
With no one who truly cares for me___

Some people want it all  
But I don't want nothing at all  
If it ain't you baby  
If I ain't got you baby  
Some people want diamond rings  
Some just want everything  
But everything means nothing  
If I ain't got you, you, you  
Some people want it all  
But I don't want nothing at all  
If it ain't you baby  
If I ain't got you baby  
Some people want diamond rings  
Some just want everything  
But everything means nothing  
If I ain't got you, yeah

If I ain't got you with me baby  
So nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing  
If I ain't got you with me baby

****Paul****

It was hard for me to leave Melody, but I had to. It was my turn to run patrol on La Push and there was nobody that could take over for me. Jared was somewhere off with Kim, doing things I didn't even want to think about, Jake, Quil and Embry had gone off on some mysterious errand for Old Quil and Seth was still pissed at me for breaking his jaw even though it had healed hours ago. And Leah, well she was probably going to draw blood the next time I saw her so asking her to take my shift was pretty much out of the question. My soul ached as I kissed Melody's forehead.

"Sweet dreams beautiful." I whispered into her ear, gently brushing a stray curl from her face. "I'll be back in the morning."

I spared another glance at her over my shoulder before exiting the room. Sue was standing at the nurse's station down the hall, talking to one of her coworkers, Margie. When Margie saw me approaching them, her face blushed red and a smile crept across her face causing small wrinkles to form in the corner of her eyes. I'd seen her at Sue's a few times over the past few years, I think they played pinochle or some other old lady card game together. I always thought she was kind of pretty for an old pale face.

"Hey Paul." she said as I approached them, the smile still plastered on her face. She fidgeted with the stray pieces of her hair, pushing them away from her face. I couldn't help but chuckle at the fact that this woman was more than twice my age, probably married with kids my age, yet just the sight of me got her granny panties in a bunch. Hilarious.

Sue turned around to face me. "How's she doing?"

I shrugged. "Pretty much the same I guess. She did like whimper or something and a tear rolled from the corner of her eye." I added.

"Did it seem like she was in pain?" Sue asked, the corners of her mouth pulling downward into a slight frown.

"No," I shook my head. "It was right after Emily and Seth left. I was a little upset and I 'm not sure but I think she could sense my frustration."

Sue nodded in understanding. "Dr. Cullen seems to think that she's aware of her surroundings. He did a pain and light stimulus test this morning and said that brain activity shows appropriate responses to the stimulus but it's not making the connection the connection with the rest of her body to wake up and respond verbally or even physically. Maybe things will be better tomorrow."

"I hope so, Sue." I sighed. I couldn't bear the thought of losing her. Even if our bond wasn't solidified she was now a part of me and always would be no matter what happened when she woke up. My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach at the thought of losing her in any way for any reason. I was willing to do anything to save her. I ran my hands through my hair, something that I hadn't been able to do in a while. It was a little longer than I liked it to be, but my every thought had been so consumed with Melody that I'd neglected to cut it down. The hair would just be one more thing that had to wait until my girl was out of the hospital.

"You're working tonight right?" Sue asked.

"Yeah. I should get going because if I'm late again, Sam's probably going to throw a tantrum. I'll be back to check on her in the morning. What time is Dr. Cullen coming in? I've got something I want to talk to him about." He would play a major role in making sure that Melody walked out of this hospital in a few days. He was one of the few people that would understand my dilemma and hopefully, he'd be willing to help.

"He'll be in around five." Margie answered. "I don't see how that man wakes up that early and always looks so perfect."

_If you only knew_. I thought to myself, sharing a knowing glance with Sue. She just shook her head and laughed.

I waved goodbye to Sue and Margie then headed towards the elevator.

Running patrol with Brady and Collin that night was the hardest thing I had to do. Not only were their immature asses my two least favorite to run with, but I had a hard time concentrating on what I was doing. Every time I would picture Melody, one of those pervs would let out an admiring howl and I'd spend twenty minutes searching for them. They had me so pissed off and distracted, I almost missed the trail of leech stink on the eastern edge of Forks. The scent traced back towards Port Angeles so I assumed that it was a rogue vamp passing through. There hadn't been any reports of deaths or missing people in the past few days so I decided that we wouldn't go any further than necessary. The closer we got to town, the thinner the forests were and the harder it was to hide. I didn't feel like lying to the police again when they came questioning us about horse sized wolves frolicking in the trees. I'd have to remember to tell Sam about the scent since he had the next patrol shift and I'd ask Carlisle in the morning if they'd had any visitors. He was normally good about telling us when he was expecting someone, but a time or two he'd forgotten and we'd damn near ripped some of his dearest friends to shreds.

As soon as patrol was done and I gave my report to Sam, I headed home to get a few hours of sleep before I went to visit Mel in the morning. Visiting hours started at eight and I wanted to be there on time, but I had a stop to make before I got to the hospital. I looked over at the clock and groaned. It was four already and that meant I'd barely get two hours of sleep. Fuck my life.

The next morning I woke up, barely on time, to find a text from Carlisle giving me the new code word to access Melody's room for the day. I quickly showered then made my way to Embry's mom's flower and gift shop.

"Morning Paulie." She smiled, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before making her way to the backroom. "Emily dropped some muffins off a few minutes ago, help yourself to a few."

I shook my head as I made my way over to the muffins. She knew damn well that I hated being called Paulie. "Morning Tiff." I looked through the plastic wrapped muffins happy to finally see something other than the usual blueberry and cranberry. I grabbed three cinnamon apple muffins from the basket then stuck a twenty in the tip jar. Times were hard for everybody on the rez and even though I didn't have much myself, I did what I could to help my people out.

Tiffany often sold muffins out of her shop for Emily since she was so shy about her scars and refused to open a bakery. Some days she'd make cupcakes and breads, but most of the time it was muffins. People came all the way from Port Angeles to pick up something on cupcake and bread days. She was definitely one of the best bakers in the Olympic Peninsula.

"Your order is almost ready." She yelled. "I just need to inflate the balloons and grab a bear from the storage closet. I know you wanted a gray bear, but the light brown one looks so much cuter holding the sun flowers. I can tie it with a gray bow if that makes you feel better, but I don't think that would look as cute as the pale yellow one I picked out."

"Whatever makes you happy." I called back, taking a huge bite from one of the muffins. They were still slightly warm, just the way I liked them.

By the time Tiffany finished my order and I made it to the hospital it was seven forty-five. I still had a few minutes to find Carlisle before visiting our officially started. Thankfully the receptionist was the same ditzy red head from the day before so a well placed smile and a wink got me early access to Melody's room.

Before I even got to Melody's room, I could smell the strong leech stink. I coughed a little as my eyes began to water and pushed open the door. Carlisle was standing at the foot of the bed, making some notation on Mel's chart and I wasn't prepared for what I saw next. Alice was sitting in the bed, with Melody's head in her lap, brushing her hair. Both of their heads turned in my direction when I entered the room.

"What the hell is going on in here?" I asked, placing the flowers and bear on the small table beside Melody's bed. Alice pulled her hair into a neat ponytail then braided the ends and tied on a gray ribbon. I couldn't help but notice how shiny her hair was, even under the dim hospital lights. Everything about her looked clean, not that she'd looked dirty before, but she looked like she was glowing. I ran the tips of my fingers up and down her arm. Her skin felt like silk.

"I hope you don't mind." Alice said in her soft musical voice as she climbed from the bed. "I gave her a bath and washed her hair. Carlisle told me that they only bathe the coma patients once a week and well, that's just not right. Sue couldn't do it because this isn't her floor and none of the nurses were willing to take the extra time and do it. You guys have done so much for us and I know it's not enough to repay you, but well, I know how important your imprints are to you so I thought you'd want her to be as comfortable as possible. I'm sorry if I overstepped my boundaries or offended you in any way." She rambled as she gathered her bag full of beauty crap. A smile appear on her face. "Even though I already know you love it. You're welcome."

"I- umm..." I cleared my throat. "Thanks?" What the hell else was I supposed to say? She was right, I did love it. I wasn't happy that a leech had her smelly hands all over my girl, but I was grateful that someone was willing to do what anything they could to keep her comfortable when I couldn't.

"I said you're welcome." She giggled. "Carlisle, I'll see you at home. Have a good day Paul. See ya later Melody."

I turned and watched as she gracefully left the room. It was almost as if she were dancing. I could hear her laughter resonating off the walls as she made jokes with the doctors and nurses in the hall. It was too damn early to be that perky.

"Sorry about that Paul." Carlisle chuckled. "Once Alice has her mind made up about something, it's kind of hard to deter her."

"It's cool." I replied absently, playing with the ribbon Alice had tied on her hair. I couldn't help but smile when I noticed the charm at the end of it. It was a circle with a wolf inside, howling at the moon. The moon had a heart carved into it. I'd never seen anything like it. I turned my attention back towards Carlisle. "Doc, I need to ask you something."

"I'm listening." Carlisle replied, leaning against the wall.

"Well, I'm sure you know about Sam getting pissed and phasing too close to Emily and damn near ripping her head off." I began.

Carlisle nodded his head. "Has something happened again?"

"No, it's nothing like that." I took a deep breath and wiped my hands on my cutoffs. "They gave Emily some of Sam's blood and it made her stronger and heal a lot faster. I mean I don't know everything that's going on with Melody, but I mean, it can't hurt to try. Maybe it could like heal whatever the pills damaged."

"I hadn't thought of that, but I think it's a great idea Paul. The healing properties of your blood may be just what she needs for a full recovery. I noticed that the moment you entered the room her heartbeat quickened. If you can get Sue to agree then we can try the first dose today."

I damn near did a cartwheel. "Thanks Carlisle. You wouldn't happen to know where Sue is would you?"

"She's on surgery rounds today. She should be done in a few hours. I'll bring her up as soon as I run into her." He looked down at his watch. "I've got a few more rounds to make. I'll see you later Paul."

"See ya doc."

When Carlisle left the room, I turned my attention towards Melody. "Good morning beautiful." I leaned down and kissed her forehead then took a seat in the chair next to her bed. I inhaled her scent. Thankfully she smelled like lavender and not leech. "I brought a book to read to you. It's a book of old Native American legends Sue used to read to me when I was sick. They aren't as amazing as the ones you'll hear when you wake up and fall madly in love with me, but they're still pretty entertaining."

I made myself comfortable then opened the book to one of my favorite stories. It was a Cherokee story about a man who married the thunder's sister. Just as I was about to start on another story, Sue and Carlisle walked in.

"Paul, I don't think this is a good idea." Sue mumbled, walking into the room with Carlisle.

"Trust me Sue." I smiled. "Look how much Sam's blood helped Emily. It's going to help her. Even Carlisle thinks so. Right doc?"

"Sue," Carlisle began as he rolled up my sleeve. "If I thought this would harm her in any way I wouldn't do it. We'll try just a small amount and see how her body reacts to it. I'm confident that this is exactly what she needs. It's what the tribe and the people in town need. Sam informed Edward a few hours ago about the scent of a rogue vampire that Paul picked up on last night and apparently Emmett and Rose picked up a few more scents on the other side of the mountains. With the possibility of threats in the area, Paul is needed for patrols."

Sue threw up her hands in defeat. "Fine. But if this ends badly..."

Carlisle and I cut her off. "It won't."

I watched as Carlisle carefully filled a small vial with my blood. He pulled a syringe from his pocket and filled it halfway with my blood. Before I could blink he was on the other side of the room throwing the syringe away.

"Had to be quick." Carlisle said as he walked over to the sink to wash his hands. Just as he turned off the water, someone entered the room. She was a dark skinned woman, slightly plump with a round face and short gray hair. She was complaining loudly on her cell phone about dramatic crazies ruining her vacation in Boca. I wanted to shove that phone down her fucking throat.

"Oh, I'm sorry." the woman said as she looked at us. "I didn't know anybody was in here."

"No need to apologize." Carlisle smiled. "I'm Dr. Cullen and this is Sue, she's a nurse here. We were just making our rounds."

"And you are?" she asked, looking straight at me.

"I'm Paul." I responded through clenched teeth. "Who are you?"

"I'm Melody's grandmother." she scoffed. She walked to the side of the bed and stared down at Melody. She shook her head. "This child never did finish anything she started." she mumbled.

I started to tremble. Carlisle took a step closer to me and placed a hand on my shoulder, holding me in place.

"Calm down, Paul." He whispered in a tone so low that only I could hear him. "I know she's upsetting you but we don't want you to cause a scene." He stepped back to where he had been standing before.

"Dr. Cullen, will she recover from this mess?" Melody's grandmother asked.

Dr. Cullen cleared his throat. "I am very confident that she will make a full recovery. Your granddaughter is a very strong young lady."

"Well when do you think she'll be ready to leave?" she asked. "Her mother and stepfather can't handle her and I'm not going to spend all of my days in this dreary hick town. I'd like to get back to Mesa as soon as possible. There's a nice facility there I can stick her in until she recovers from this, if she ever recovers. If not, I'm sure the state won't mind covering her living expense in the facility until she dies."

"She will recover!" I yelled, jumping up from my seat. It slammed against the wall behind me. "And you can go to Hell for all I care you evil old bitch, but she's not going anywhere!"

"Paul!" Sue yelled, grabbing my arm. "In the hall now!"

I yanked away from her, causing her to stumble a bit. There was no way that I was going to leave Melody with that crazy old bitch. Now that I knew her plan, I'd never leave Mel's side. I could feel my body trembling and my wolf trying to break free. I wanted to unleash him and rip this old bat to shreds, but I knew that no good would come of that. I closed my eyes and willed myself to calm down. If I lost it, I'd never be able to see Melody again and she'd be stuck with this woman for all of eternity.

"And just to make sure we're all on the same page," her grandmother said, reaching into her purse. She pulled out an envelope and handed it to Carlisle. "Inside you will find a copy of the transfer of guardianship papers and a court order demanding the release of Melody into the custody of myself and Canyon Falls Psychiatric Rehabilitation Center. You have ninety-six hours to comply."

She was really taking her away from me. That's when I lost it.

**A/N: Thank you to all of my reviewers, and those that favorite and follow the story. It means a lot to me. Your support is greatly appreciated.**


End file.
